We are given the gift of the Holy Spirit when we truly ask Jesus Christ to be our Savior and to forgive our sins. But it is our choice whether we are truly filled, and controlled, and empowered by the Holy Spirit. Think of it like this. You may have a King who comes to live in your house. You can ask him to live in a small room; or you can ask him to be in charge of the whole house. So you can have the Holy Spirit in your life but you can try to run your own life, or you can ask God the Holy Spirit to fill and control your entire life.
"For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has set you free from the law of sin and of death." Romans 8:2
"However, you are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God dwells in you. But if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong to Him." Romans 8:9
To ask the Holy Spirit to fill and control and empower your life, and to fill you with God’s love and power, you can pray and ask in faith for God to fill you with His Holy Spirit. Here is a sample prayer that you can pray. "Holy Father, thank You that You gave Your Son Jesus Christ to die on the cross for my sins. I ask forgiveness for my sins and want You to be Lord over my life and to be in control. I give You control of my life and ask that you fill and control me with Your Holy Spirit. Please be in charge of my life every day and give me Your power to live a Christian life each and every day."
"But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not carry out the desire of the flesh." Galations 5:16